Visit your local brewery and sit down at the bar and say—in a voice that’s just a little too loud—“You know, a brewery is an awful lot like a public library!” When someone asks why, tell them: “Well, aside from all the books you want to read, the library has streaming movies for free and you can reserve a meeting room and it doesn’t cost anything.” When they respond with “The brewery doesn’t have anything like that!”, you can say, “Hmm, well I guess the library is better than a brewery!” and walk out.
Use the library’s resources to work on your résumé and apply for several job openings. When you inevitably get interviewed and they comment on how stellar your résumé is (exaggerate if you must), tell them how you wrote it using the library’s computer stations and proceed to list many other things the library offers, like video games and ukuleles. When they notice that your last job was at the library, say, “You know, you’re right. I can’t leave that job, it’s the best job I ever had,” and walk away.
Update your profile on the various dating sites you use so that you attract people who don’t already have library cards. When you are matched with someone, ask to meet them at the library. Give them a tour of the library and ask the librarian for book recommendations based on their profile. Send them off with a hearty handshake, a library card, and a stack of books.
Does your library loan ukuleles in their Library of Things? If not, insist that they do, then teach yourself to play the uke and write a song parody that references the library. Practice it and play it at local Open Mics. Note: you can introduce the song by saying that the venue you’re playing in is an awful lot like a public library (see suggestion number one).
In all seriousness, the fifth way is the best way. Get enthusiastic about your library and what it offers your community. Bring it up in conversation; look for opportunities to talk about how the library helps people solve problems and grow and achieve and entertain themselves for free.
If you’re looking for some talking points, the Whatcom County Library System created an inspiring and informative ten-minute video with staff and patrons advocating and celebrating the wonders of our library. Steal this idea—go forth and spread the word!